Okay so here i am baking cupcakes at 01:14 in the morning, decorating, baking making it look all pretty, all 90 of them!! school bake sale? entrepreneurs day you might ask? ( because if you are a mom then these are perfect excuses for being in the kitchen baking silly hours of the morning right?) WELL i am baking them for no apparent reason, giving them to the kids, packing extra-ordinary lunches for tomorrow, ironing the clothes for work,school,karate and then clothes for after karate, prepping for tomorrow's breakfast, signing of homework books, checking homework etc...if you're a mom...then you'll get where i am coming from right..because i am trying my butt of to be supermom , over compensating and feeling extra bad when my sense of humour or patience runs dry! In one second i can go from angelic temptress and lover to a black widow, a sugary sweet mommy to a Dracula ready to ...well you get what i mean! so why do we put so much pressure on ourselves to be perfect? And most of all why is it socially unacceptable to admit that you're not? and what exactly is perfect and to who's standards? Well as you very well know..i love writing about my life's experiences so here goes..the day i found out i was supermom...! We all have these competitive thorns in our sides..the dreaded perfect mom at school...she's perfect at baking, needlework, art projects for school, and just about everything else, she is one of the class representatives at school, she helps on sport days and any other event happening, she has the perfect husband, perfect daughter and perfect little boy..they have perfect family holidays and off course all of this while she still holds down a perfect full time job!!! So here i was this one Monday morning dropping of my Dash Light year at school and here walks Mrs perfect, for all records let's call her Villain X, ( i like the ring to that VILLAIN X)! You know when someone just knows how to push the right buttons... It all started the Monday morning..for some reason i just did not hear the alarm, and disaster management 1 for the week struck! It's 07:00 i have a child with adhd and suddenly getting it all done in 30 minutes looks like... well....you know! So here follows a brief description of how the week went! Monday over slept, fell when i came in the kitchen, (think i will need a hip replacement, but I'll live)got up in record speed and stupid looked if someone saw me...wth? almost grabbed the cupboard door off it's hinges while getting the cereal box ( as if this is going to spare me some time?) Chuck in milk go down the passage make a u turn forgot the honey, add honey start power walk down the passage, sigh of relief, D is awake...just spared 3 minutes!!! Lady time is on my side this morning because he is starving and races through his cereal.... aah start dressing him, he gets irritated by this gesture and demands on doing it himself...stop arguing and start delegating!! School starts at 07:45 it is now 07:40 thank heavens we live so close and he dashes into the gates like dash from the incredibles and makes it in a nick of time!!!phew!!!No detention slip today YEAH! Tuesday... This is really beginning to pull at my patience because once again i did not hear the alarm and blame the late nights!!!!!!!! Same Routine as yesterday with a little more drama off course but, once again my little Booba dashes through the school gates this time like Mr Buzz light year himself!!! Much to Villain X's Amusement, and just there it feels like someone just threw me with an ice cold bucket of in your face!!!i have no make-up on, my green pick'npay slippers boots ( which by the way is much warmer than those nine west..uhm i mean nine inch heels!) (and i can run faster!) standing out like a neon sign under my track pants and jersey!! and yes you guessed it, she looks as if she just stepped out of a magazine...who looks like that this time of the am? THAT IS IT!!! I will wake up on time tomorrow..make b/fast,have clothes ready...I am going to be SUPERMOM!!!!! Wednesday.. 04:30 i will not even tempt Murphy by asking how i heard the alarm this morning,but i get up , make breakfast, bacon, toast,eggs,danish,juice,coffee,tea the works! Wake up my little super dude, get him into a tracksuit and those takkies and we are going for a walk!! he's excited, we enjoy the walk, but i need my fix..I'll do anything for the fix..you know what i am talking about, we all need one,whether it's decaf or caff we can't survive without it..and i need a hardcore shot of espresso (or 2), so we make the walk a bit faster so that we can get home, go through the morning perfect, drop little super dude off at school, even before VILLAIN X and her little Pozzie arrives at school! Thursday Repeated as Wednesday! And Friday meets me with a smile......not really.. but i grab the rest of my body out of bed, and drag myself to the kitchen..feels like a train or 6 of them challenged me and i lost! but here we go same as Wednesday and Thursday... Now you can just imagine this laid back, chilled out family, who does weird things, who's always late, and annoyingly always tooo relaxed but anyways..the point is we should actually be living next to the coast cause we are just chill like that! The weekend came..and so did the 100's of biscuits etc. i baked, my super dude felt like a decorated biscuit by the end of the weekend.and i could tell that this perfect little family of mine is on the edge...and then Sunday evening the bomb bursts!!!!! My alarm clock is gone.....i can't find super dude's lunchbox, i forgot to buy yogurt and the coffee is finished... and then my hubby (as if this is normal) Ag but you can just quickly pop in at the shop tomorrow like you always do when you forget something...... WHAT??? and then, super dude says very cautiously...and mommy can i sleep a little later tomorrow, because i am really tired...and hubby says and can i please just have cereal in the morning because all this eating is making me feel ill, and super dude just have to slip in there with a " i think it's better for mommy too, because your hip needs to rest( HE SAW ME) humiliation just swallowed me in...supermom without wings! HA so jumping up and looking if anyone saw me isn't as dumb as i thought!! Ungrateful suckers! No, we just like you the way you are, yes mommy i have the coolest mom in the world, and now you.. you are like a crazy robot Mom! Aww really? My husbands reply" Yes babe, i love you the way you are, unorganised but always getting it done, we like how you roll" and super dude says " YES You are MY Supermom!!" SUPERMOM...ME...SUPERMOM? i am tearing up here..... Now there you have it! Nothing was wrong but i tried to fix it! Every Family has it's own way of making things work..sometimes it goes smooth and sometimes...well sometimes you almost break a hip because of an alarm clock malfunction... but All families has hiccups whether you do it woman alone or Like Villain X with 2 nanny's and a butler's helping you out with the morning routines..but don't change the way you manage your household...because your man married you and is in love with you because you and your ways are what he fell in love with,( Men are not nearly as stupid as we think...when they are younger they party with the party chicks,Drink till they pass out but as they mature,( but i have to warn you a few of them never do!) But those who do, they start to look at THEIR WIVES and the woman they choose differently.suddenly the wife material they are looking for gets chosen with different criteria, someone they can love forever, who can bare their children, who can manage their households,who can plan the family vacations that they work so hard to provide, role models that their kids can look up to and a woman that's gonna have his back as much as he will have hers! and that's how we became the good wife's and mom's that we are) we were chosen of the A list! And your kids , your adorable, sometimes driving mom up the walls -kids, just adore you no matter how crazy you are, how angry you get, how much or how little you give, how imperfect or perfect you are! We are their SUPERMOMS and SUPER WIVES even if we some time's feel the need to compare ourselves to others who seemingly has such a more perfect Life than ours, sometimes.just sometimes the grass is not greener on the other side... So don't ever second guess yourself You are a super in your own right and those who matter don't care and those who cares don't matter! xxx
Thursday, 31 October 2013
Wednesday, 30 October 2013
Never, Ever , Ever , Ever and i mean ever cheat on your Hairdresser! Let me begin by just defending myself in this whole situation....For the past 2 months i have been so busy, early early mornings, late late nights, we were busy with a huge marketing campaign in cape town and i had little time for myself!Saturday We were invited to a birthday Party of a friend's brother, Now let me start by saying my hair is not the easiest of hair because i have to straighten, and blow and straighten again before i can be seen in public, and when i wake up in the mornings i always say thanks first that my husband has stuck with me this long because my hair curls up like a bad perm that only a mother could love!! I could only get an appointment with my hairdresser for this Wednesday, so i popped into a Local salon, and asked if i could just have a little trim on them split ends...and this is what happened: I Got there and waited 10 minutes to be taken into a little room that looks like a dungeon( or it could be me just feeling paranoid) they washed my hair and i was looking forward to being treated to that nice scalp massage that they do when they wash your hair, but instead i got cold water and a woman who was obviously angry at her husband because she washed my head V I G U R O U S L Y!!! damn man my scalp was on fire, but i still had an incling of hope that there was still a massage...rinse...cold water again...dripping down my spine....aaaahhhh here it comes, here it comes....BOOM over WTH? I go over to the seat of death in front of the mirror and my hairdresser with her glassy eyes says, so what will we be doing today? " oh just a little of the split ends and thin it out a little, because i do have an appointment for Wednesday...gulp... she picks up the scissors and i get a flash back of that Edward scissor hands movie, and i tell her that my hair is worse that a poodles when it is dry, no no it's fine don't worry about it, but i do want to cut a little fringe because it will suit you beautifully.. double gulp, uhm i haven't had one of those since std 6, but whatever you are the professional, just not too short please in a nervous voice off course, she snips and she clips and suddenly when she cuts the fringe it goes down in slooooowwwwwww moooottioon, noooooooooooooooo!! it's tooo short,it's tooo short! this woman takes the dryer, yip that's gonna make it grow back...she blows it with furious passion flicks it left , flicks it right and woala, "Kyk net hoe pragtag, sjoe dit lyk mooi...i could not look at myself in the mirror, either because of shock or concussion, because she dropped the front part of the dryer on my head when she was in the zone!! I tell her ever so politely that it's fine, i will see how it looks when she flat iron's and blow dries it...but nothing..i mean Nada.. zip , zero..get the picture? She sends me out with half dry hair curling up like a bad, bad, morning wake up perm..and a fringe that looks like a bad version of Jolandi Visser.. NOW WHAT??? i still have to walk out get milk and bread etc. and it's a busy mall AND i have a party on for tonight, clips is all i could think about. so i stand at pick and pay, hiding behind my wallet hoping no one i know sees me like this, because they will probably think that i have split up with my husband and gone on drugs or something,,yes that's how bad it looks! i pull at my hair at the bottom of my curls and guess what...bam on the counter a 6 cm piece of hair falls out probably about 1cm wide, like a badly done extension... i pick it up, dropped it in the bag, and sped out like a woman on nitro's!! I got home , clipped up hair, and my husband with a wth? expression... because normally when i get back.. i am relaxed, hair styledto perfection feeling like a million bucks( because after all it's part of your cut?, but by this time, my eyes are blood shot, my face is pale and i am in a panic looking like a woman on a mental break down!! " not bad love he says.. Not Bad? Not Bad? i ripped out the first clip then the second...NOT BAD Hey? my voice shockingly SHRIEK..uhm he looks like a deer caught in the headlights..uhm maybe you should flat iron it, and see maybe she had a vision. a Vision.. I pulled out the lock of hair in the bag.. he Wants to burst a vain but you could see..he knows it would mean disaster..do not dare to laugh at a woman having a melt down lol! So Long story Short .. with some good wax and 2 hours of blow dry, flat iron and clips it started to look semi decent again...except for the fringe that is cut sooo short it will probably take 7 months to grow out! So what have i learned out of this experience? your hairdresser is like your life partner, they know your personality, your lifestyle, and your hair ( on it's good AND bad days) and they know how to bring out the beauty in your locks..you just never ever ever ever cheat on them..because you don't know what you have, how good they are until a Jolandi Visser crazed fan gets hold of a scissor and starts going clipper happy!