Wednesday 3 April 2013

Life

And So within a few hours a celebration of my 34th year of life awaits me, and as I look back on my life I can't help but feel too fat, too unhealthy, not good enough, not happy with the grey hair and sad about the wrinkles. The era of my  skinny body and smooth and silky skin feels like ages ago..
But So much has changed, I have grown into a woman, a wife and a mother..I have in comparison matured gracefully and I can't help but forget about the worries I mentioned above..
I have a husband who loves me, a son who adores me and friends who cares.
I have a warm bed at night, the safety of a building I call home, I have both my parents giving me hugs and cheering me on in my race of life, I have a mother in law who finally respects me and cares for me like I am her own.
I have two brothers who will fight to the death to protect me, I have a God who thinks I am perfect and special.
I have the gift of sight, and the joy of sound.
I have the ability to walk on the grainy sands along the ocean...
And I feel guilty, because in life these are all that's really important!

What is it in this life that makes us feel like there's always something more that we need to do, something we have not yet achieved?
Why is it that we find ourselves competing to be "The Perfect Woman" and then feel like we are always falling short in the "Mrs. Perfect" Department?
Why is it that we look at some woman and think to ourselves that we wish we could be more like them?
They make being a mom, a boss, a wife an entertainer and a friend look so easy?
They just glide through life solving problems without breaking a sweat, answers questions with not one missed heartbeat? Mrs. Calm in a panic stricken situations, Mrs I can eat as much strawberry cheesecake and not gain 1kg? Miss I baked a 100 cupcakes for the school bake sale and still Never have one hair out of place not even one imperfection on her perfectly made up face..and she does this having 4 kids?? Jealousy creeps in and your perfectly rose coloured heart beats slower as the darkness of the green eye monster chokes the life out of it...

Because we choose to..Yes it is that simple..We choose to put ourselves down because in our mind society has these high expectations of what the perfect wife , mother and woman is..
If you wake up every morning thankfull, gratefull and loved by child and husband then you are pretty darn perfect..
A friend I use to hold dearly told me once that at their church they had stones in front where their preacher preached, On each stone it said I CHOOSE, and the message that was preached was that every emotion you have is a choice that you make, If you lose your temper and get angry, that is a choice!
So tonigh at the dawn of a new year I CHOOSE to celebrate a life of a phenomenal woman, a woman who admits she is not perfect to herself but to her loved ones she's the best.
A woman who Chooses to accept that I might not have the small body I use to have, but that my curves makes me who I am, A woman who chooses to embrace life,change and her imperfections and live. A Woman who chooses not to imprison herself with her own low self esteem any longer,A woman who Chooses to Love Life , Love God and Love Herself, Because my dear fellow phenomenal women, once you let Go and Let God your life Will change drastically, amazingly, beautifully and nothing can make your sunshine disappear any longer , you will realise that age does not matter But the measure in how much joy you have lived life with and how much of that you have shared with your fellow man  That is really all that Matters the gift of sharing love, life and joy
So let's all go out tomorrow and choose to live, laugh and love not just ourselves but also the people around us
xx
C&L.

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